Sonograms and Spoilers

One moment, I was certain. I could feel it. I was having a boy.

The next, I’d ask myself:

“How would I know? I’ve never been pregnant before.” Me awash with common sense. And hormones.

Besides, I wasn’t sure I wanted to know ahead of time.

24 days before my due date (16 days before I gave birth, as it happened), I was having my first and only sonogram. To prepare, I’d done some reading. In other words, I knew what to look for, if my baby was brazen enough, to determine what its gender was. I knew what the little line of three dots between the legs meant if it was there.

But I still wasn’t sure I wanted to know.

Lying on the padded, papered table, I listened to the young technician, who may or may not have won a Miss Congeniality Award at some local beauty pageant, jabber away about size and heart rate and I-don’t-know-what-else, while I tried to convince myself that jelly stuff hadn’t really just come out of the freezer.

Then she got my attention.

“Do you want to know the baby’s sex?” Young Sonogram Tech
“No.” Me
“Oh, look — it’s a girl!” Her

WTF? The white paper crinkling beneath me as I craned to see the screen, I said:

“Really?!”

She heard me for the first time. “Why?” she asked, “Do think it’s a boy?”

I was looking at the dots. The three little white dots lined up straight as could be, almost glowing in the bouncing sound waves, standing vertical between two obvious legs in what would have been a mortifying crotch shot if that’s when the tech had taken the picture. Unless she had another monitor and I had a second uterus I was unaware of, we were looking at the same image. Was she even newer to this than I was?

It would have been rude to question her competence out loud, so I just said:

“Well, I’ve always thought it was a boy.” Me. Absolutely certain now I was having a son.

And she, blithely oblivious, said:

“Oh, well then it probably is. I’ve found the mothers are usually right.”

Sweet kid, just not one to instill a lot of confidence.

Fortunately, my boy had the decency to roll over and give the camera a profile head shot. He wasn’t going to parade his dots, but, personally, this photo pretty much convinced me I was having a bouncing baby boy alien.

Sonogram
Look — the little alien is waving!

Why don’t parents want to be surprised anymore?

Author: Sue Ranscht

Having survived valve repair surgery and an experimental cardiac bypass at age 5, three years before it was an accepted medical procedure, Susan grew into the size of her overworked and enlarged heart. Maybe she thought she had enough to give it away -- twice. Both times, she had to retrieve the shattered pieces and puzzle them back together. She thanks her Dad for the only advice of his she ever followed to the letter: "Never get married. Learn to take care of yourself." So of course she is a writer. Susan has co-written a YA SciFi novel, and has three more novels in various stages of evolution. She's had several short stories published in other people's anthologies, some of which were contest-related. Let her tell you a story...

28 thoughts on “Sonograms and Spoilers”

  2. Pingback: Posts of Note (Week 3) – A Kinder Way

    1. Thank you, Lindsay! The day has been busy and moving faster than I’d like, but most of them are like that right now. I’ve taken a look at your post with the Creative Blogger Award, and I have a question: Is being nominated the same thing as being awarded one, or is there a mysterious judge somewhere who decides who gets the award?

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  4. 19 years ago I knew I was having a boy. I just knew it. Everyone thought..for some reason, that I wanted a girl. I didn’t. I knew I was much better suited for a boy. Even during labor and delivery,,,,everyone kept saying…’You’re gonna have a girl!’ I just knew I wasn’t and I didn’t.
    I wanted to be surprised too. Never even thought about asking what sex the baby was. I’m not sure why people don’t want to be surprised anymore. I guess for practical reason? Easier to plan/shop for? Are they still wrong as often as they used to be? I don’t know.
    I loved this post and will be sharing it today in my Posts of Note. 🙂

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    1. Why, thank you! I’m honored. The younger parents I’ve asked all say they want to know ahead of time for their own convenience, so I think you’ve got it right. To me, that removes one layer of joy — although I’m sure none of them would agree. It also changes “planning for a baby” to “planning for a girl” or “planning for a boy”, which seems to invite setting them up to be treated differently. I know they ARE different, but I tried to avoid using “because you’re a boy” as the reason for anything. On the other hand, I know a couple in their mid-thirties who are having their third after having 2 girls whose sex they knew ahead of time. They’ve decided to let this one be a surprise. So there is hope…

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      1. You are very welcome. That’s interesting. I truly had no desire to know. I had no money to plan either! LOL Everything i got was hand me downs so it didn’t matter if he was a boy or a girl! 😉 None of that mattered to me anyway.

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  5. I knew I was having a son too. We went to the sonogram and I’ll never forget this moment, the gynae zoomed in between the baby’s legs and Mr said “Are those balls?”. We burst out laughing. They were balls. Your story shows the strength of a mother’s instinct.

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    1. Many women I’ve talked with about this over the years say they had dreams about their baby’s gender. So far, all the dreams have been accurate. Though some, like Sommer and Susan Bruck below, thought the opposite of what was true, even if they had accurate dreams. Mr sounds like he was proud. And impressed. Lol!

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  6. I thought my daughter was a boy but hoped for a girl. Then turned around and thought my son was a girl and hoped for a boy. Clearly! I had no clue. I think I had so much self-doubt about my ability to mother – that I was doubting before I even gave birth.

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        1. I kept trying not to talk myself into a choice. But when I had a dream I was holding a baby girl with lots of wavy black hair, and I told her, “You’re very sweet, but you’re not mine so you’ll have to go back,” I was a little freaked out.

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    1. I think the urge to reproduce someone like ourselves is strong. My mom had 5 girls (I was the second), and when I was 19 (the youngest was 11), I asked my dad if he ever wanted a son. His reply: “Not NOW!” Is there a chance you’ll try again?

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